From home to home and back again!

I am currently sat in San Francisco International Airport (SFO) with a pint of Stella and my laptop and I have been thinking about how fortunate I am at this point in my life. I'll explain what I mean (hopefully) below.
I am going HOME! England's green shores beckon (even though they are currently white); London, Surrey, Kent, and Nottingham to get started! My home is Nottingham. This will always be my home because it where the most important thing in my life is: my family. I have always believed that where your heart belongs is where your home is. Therefore: HOME is Nottingham.
On the opposite side of the coin there is the old adage: I left my heart in San Francisco. I can see where this comes from. SF (or "The City") is a wonderful place. I was instantly made to feel welcome by everyone I've met and I'm thankful for that. I have come to refer to the room in Convent in which I live as home. This is no less true than my talk of Nottingham being home.
I find myself almost at odds with this. The City is where I live, work, have a lot of friends, and some great times. It is typically my home. However, I find myself thinking of my family and how it might sadden them to hear me say that. I'd love to be able to say that I have two homes (which is true) but somehow I don't think they want to hear me say: I'm going home on January 6th. I know it seems strange but my family have an incredible bond that I will not find again until I perhaps instill it in my own.
I have been rambling. I apologise for that. However, if one of my brothers reads this (either one really) I hope they'll understand what I mean. I'm simply one of the luckiest blokes on Earth. I have two homes and each have different qualities. If I was made to choose? I would hope all of my readers would know which...without even having to think.

Again, Thanks for listening! Maybe one day I'll write about something that matters to others, not just myself. But, as it stands, this is my selfish output.

Support Functions

It's amusing to think I used to work in what was called a Support Function at a personal loan company. I used to hate it and love it. Hate it because it was almost insinuating a lesser role in the company and loved it because it meant I had keys to everywhere and not even the head of IT security had the same access as me. I kinda ran the show...very well considering the tiny amount of work I had to do!

Anyway, the above isn't why I am writing this. It seems that the title of Support Function can still be applied to me today and I am very proud of that. In my current role as Youth Minister to the Parish of St Cecilia in San Francisco; I offer support to Priests, Young People, teachers, and occasionally parents too. This is all well and good but STILL not what I'm referring to.

My friendships are what keep me going and I'm pleased to report that apparently mine can have the same affect on those who help me. Sometimes I'm a listening post for people, a sounding board if you will. Other time I have words to say/type and THIS is what makes me a support function. Something I am INCREDIBLY proud of.

Retreat

Not in the sense of leaving a battle. In the sense of taking yourself away and assessing, thinking, praying, talking.
This weekend (Thursday to Sunday) I will be at the CYO Camp in Occidental, Southern California. Myself and my boss are leading the students of the 8th Grade in a retreat of transition. Preparing them to separate when going to high school, helping them to grow a stronger bond with each other to allow friendships to remain, and helping them discuss the loss of their classmate in the San Bruno explosion. They have had the opportunity for counseling but this will be a tough weekend for them as they talk to each other about it.
Wish me luck. The hardest yet most rewarding part of my job is about to begin.

If at first you don't succeed...

I found this through an internet tool called "StumbleUpon". You fill in your preferences; likes, hobbies, etc... and click "stumble" it will find things that apply to you and in doing so you can refine what it gives you by adding favourites and such.
Anyway, I found this today and I loved it. Often life throws things at us that aren't easy. Things that it would be easier to give up on. I urge you to take these words and try to apply them. It'll be a difficult task but it's worth it in the end. Just ask one of my best friends and the baby she is carrying.

Beauty and Inspiration

My friend Sam inspires me with her strength. Her ability to take what is being given to her and keep her radient smile on here face, her determined look in her eye. She is currently smiling at horror and is getting a hesitant look in return. Inspiring.
I was driving down Ulloa Street to 31st yesterday and ahead of me was only sand, sea, and sunset on the horizon. Beauty.

Work, work, work!

There are those who would argue that my job isn't exactly what you would call taxing. On the most part I would agree. From the point of view of someone who does the whole 9 to 5 bit it may seem that I live part the life of a worker and part the life of a student.
However, show me a 9 to 5er who would spend their Saturday night playing games, sharing, going to mass, and getting 10 minutes of sleep on the Bleachers of a school gym! That's right. St Cecilia Youth Group Lock In 2010 allowed me 10 minutes of sleep which has since changed into back pain.
Am I seeking sympathy? No. I am merely showing that there is somewhat of a balance to all things in life. Yes, I get to do great things like the planned Rock Climbing, Camping and hopefully the Ski retreat. But I also have to chaperone 65 kids who have no interest in sleeping at all!!

Loves me my job!

Illnesses and Death

Sombre, Morbid, Depressing? Well, yes. It kind of has to be. Our nature is to find such things wrong. A Punishment. They bring the "Why me?!" mentality to the fore of our attitudes and often lead to disagreements and cause people to drift, drive a wedge between themselves. I hope this never happens to me.

Over the past week I have had some bad news. One of my close friends has been diagnosed with Leukemia and 2 people from our Parish of St Cecilia whom I worked closely with were killed by the San Bruno explosion last week. It has at times been overwhelming. Luckily my "colleagues" are Priests and they have been great but my friends away from work have been their equals also. I am lucky enough to have a safety net that is spread far and wide - UK to USA. I am incredibly appreciative of my friends at this point.

What I wanted to tell you in the post is how I managed to help myself with this also. I think my attitude to our morbid title has changed over the past week. Whereas I still get choked up and teary (I have no problem telling the World this - I cry! Get over it.) I have come to look on these passings and challenges in a different light.

As for my friend...well, she is (and I quote) "A tough cookie". She is surrounded by love and support and that tells me I'm not alone in feeling love for her. It also tell me I am not abandoning someone. There is no abandonment in numbers as far as I'm concerned.

The way I look at the "Passings" of our 2 Parishioners is summed up on the notice board at the door of the Church. It reads: Jacki and Janessa Greig are in the care of the Lord. This is what my Faith teaches us. Death, whereas devastating for who remain, is the beginning of your life with your God. Your new life where you wait for the correct time when your loved one's will join you.

When I think of death I often visualise Gandalf talking to Pippin in The Lord of the Rings. He says:

Pippin: I didn't think it would end this way.
Gandalf: End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path... One that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass... And then you see it.
Pippin: What? Gandalf?... See what?
Gandalf: White shores... and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise.
Pippin: [smiling] Well, that isn't so bad.
Gandalf: [softly] No... No it isn't. 

I think my perspective is now Trust in your beliefs (whatever they are - I'm not trying to preach my own). Without faith in something we must feel lost at these times. With Faith I am guided and reassured. With my friends and family - I am protected.

Prayers for San Bruno

At approximately 6pm last night there was a natural gas explosion in San Bruno, CA. The explosion destroyed homes, severely damaged others and has ripped the community apart.
Some people known to me through my work are missing. I ask for your prayers for those lost, found, alive, injured, and sadly dead.
My prayers are with everybody affected by this.

New Tricks

I'm seeking designers, artists; anyone who would be able to take a few facts about my life and put it to a design that will be with me forever.
I want a new tattoo. I'd like it to be "me" if you will.
I'd like it reflect the things that are most important to me, the places I have been, and my adventure in the States. Below is a beautiful picture which I love and I'm seriously considering this or parts of it. It was "penned" by a very close friend of mine and he caught certain things about what I am and used symbology to portray me.
Here is the Golden Gate Bridge (I live in San Francisco), Me (shown as St Christopher) with my guitar and family (shown as the small child), wading through the new shores I find myself in in The USA (hence the stars and stripes). It truly encapsulates what I want. Me, My Family, My music, my Faith, My Adventure.

I love it. If anyone who is specifically a Tattoo designer reads this and would be willing to give me another option I'd love to hear from you!

Lastly, heartfelt thanks and love to Craigy. You knocked this out in record time and you're still wanting to improve it with research. MH.

"Workin hard or hardly workin, eh Mac?"

I have been working my ASS off! But, what do I have to show for it?? Not a great deal but, that's OK. You see, my job is for the most part face to face people encounters with the occasional reflection given or song sung etc... So, for the most part (quite opposite to most people in the working wilderness) I've been doing both of the above. Working hard AND hardly working!

Why am I telling you this? The reason, beloved readers, is this: I am about to engage in my first attempt of Directing, Producing, Promoting, and Distributing of a small educational film...it's HARD WORK! I'm stressed and shattered and (in San Francisco's first hot day of the year) I'm sweating! I never knew so much went into the creation of a small video (at least one that is to educate)!

I guess I just wanted a break from the work and therefore I shared this with you!

I think I need to find something of meaning to talk about soon...it's going on too long that I am spouting about my life! You must be INCREDIBLY bored!

Again, thanks for listening!

Life

My life is in disarray! There is stuff EVERYWHERE! My office is a tip, I am STILL yet to put away the newly washed, ironed, and folded clothes that lie on my sofa! But, despite the chaos of my outwardly visible life - I am content to say the least. Life is good and the only thing I would like is some sun for SF!

Randomness - over.

Quiet...

I have been noticeably VERY quiet of late. I apologise in the first instance and revel in the fact that I haven't written for a while because I've been simply too busy having fun!

This summer was great for me. I got to go home and see my family, I got to visit with friends, I got some closure on some stuff, and I went to OKC - the single most hottest place I've ever been! I am absolutely shattered now. Back to work and right in the thick of things! I have more planning than most teachers!!

This year is going to be a significant one for me - when I returned to the US I was told I have to leave August 1st 2011...not the 2013 date I had originally! I now have to fill out the forms again and get applying. Fingers crossed for that one guys. Failing that my romance with the USA will be shorter than I thought. SO, what to do, what to do?? I'm going to go for it! Work my ass off and hope to travel as much as I can.

Shopping list - Map of the USA and Map pins! I want to see where I go on this HUGE continent. Incidentally if anyone knows a way of doing this electronically please let me know!

Hopefully I'll get back into my online diary/journal. It does help to talk to you all...whoever you are or aren't!

Stan Frank's Disco!

It's a weird sensation. I was looking forward to coming home SO much. I've loved being home. Seeing my family and friends, and I'm looking forward to my birthday celebrations obviously but...I am now looking forward to returning to SF.

This might be to escape certain things and find something else to focus on...and it maybe that I have missed the city, the "house", and my friends. If I'm honest, it's both!!

This is my on-line venting medium so thanks for listening!

Doctors and Nurses...

I have recently been subjected to both Health Services in my life - UK and US. Whereas the American Medical System can be elitest, serving only those who can afford it - it's efficient! You go to the medical centre and get everything done in the same place. They sent me home with notes from my operation, ex-rays, and directions for my doctor to follow to see if the plate is doing what it should...
At my UK doctor I was told: I wouldn't have the first idea what to do with this, i'll write a letter to the fracture clinic and you should have an appointment in a couple of weeks - doesn't fill me with a great deal of confidence!

So, in short, I think I'm lucky to have such good insurance in the US and look forward to getting back over there to get my wrist fixed!!

Children...

DON'T WORRY! I'm not being broody!
I have just really enjoyed seeing the babies since I've been back. They were all really pleased to see me and my niece Olivia asked me: 'What's your hotel in America like Uncle Boo Boo?' I mean, you can't write that cuteness!

All of the children in my life give me such a good experiences I wanted to document my appreciation. So this is it. Even in the times of boredom and loneliness, a small child can spread a smile across your face and put laughter in your eyes.

Book

I've been in the US for a few months now and I'm looking forward to the trip home. Mainly to see my family which, as you now know, is a many faceted beast.
Last Saturday I watch the England vs USA World Cup match. Not happy with the result is the easiest way to describe my feelings! But we went to the beach to play footy and I broke my wrist. I'm not going to detail it here as I've told this story so many times this past week!
My entry - the first in a while - is to tell you of what my boss said to me today:

Sean, you have been here just more than 2 months and you could write a book about your experiences with more than most Californians have experienced!

I may attempt this...once my wrist is working again!

I can't wait to be home. See you all soon!!

Hallo!

I find myself in a constant battle with our cousins form across the pond! A jovial battle full of smiles and laughter.

My accent is nothing short of a "Hot Topic" for my new friends and neighbours. I recently met a gentleman of NOBLE British heritage (not actually noble but I thought it added something to our nationality). He was born in Iceland, raised in Texas (by his British Grandmother), and now lives in "The City". It was interesting to talk to him and here I'll share some of the reasons why;

Every now and then he spoke with a British Accent, he used words that simply aren't American such as referring to me as: Mate.

The one joy of this guy is that he is FIERCELY American. He's a Republican!! Dun-dun-der! Whenever he was addressing me though he started by grinning and proclaiming in a loud, happy voice: Hallo! (in a wonderfully Southern English accent) He thought he was poking fun, I found it to be him accepting me and embarking in some new friendships.

Long Weekend!

I'm in the country of the most long weekends! These guys celebrate most things. Which is great!

I'm having my own long weekend this weekend. It's a 4-5 day weekend which I'm only my usual 1 day into (2 days I can handle) but there is still 3 days to go. I know the reasons for this. I know they are warranted and deserved but...I'm not loving it. It's completely selfish of me and I think the people who know why will know about my little selfish tendencies. I just wanted...needed to vent it and this is my online diary/soap-box/release so here it is. I know my 3 followers won't judge me.

I am...irrational. I apologise!

Travels, tales, experience, and energy

Since I have been here the most enjoyable thing for me has been meal times. Not only due to the great food I've experienced (and I have) but because of the Priests I live/work with. I have been regaled with tales of their ministry, their habits, their lives, and their loves. Better still is when they have guests, these guys have lived and I'd like to share with you a little story I heard tonight.

Jack O'Neill is a Priest who was once Chaplain at San Quentin State Penitentiary (the only death row in California and incidentally the largest in the US), served in the Navy as Chaplain (actually served, not just as Chaplain but in combat), and is now retiring from the PRIESTHOOD. He has such a colourful history and I really enjoyed our conversations over dinner this evening. Especially the story of a Mexican in-mate at "San Q" who upon entering the prison was guarded by 2 guards because he was carrying a knife. Jack spoke with him and it turned out to be a culinary knife for peeling Garlic. The powers that be didn't care to ask the question. So, Jack did his homework and went to the Prison Admin to tell them that this harmless (and VERY old) prisoner was just that and if they removed the guards they would save $750, 000!

The guards were removed.

I guess the moral of the story is: if it seems like you won't be heard or listened to (like Jack) the only way to know if you will or not is to TRY. It's all anyone can ask of you. And just think; you might make a difference. We can ALL make a difference!

English is ENGLISH!

OK, a few days past I read a friends BLOG and I decided to see what the fuss about this book he quoted was so I diligently went onto Amazon to buy it. Whilst there I bought some of my favourite book collections. One of which is the Harry Potter saga - don't judge, I find them entertaining!

Now, to the point. I have started reading "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone". This is all fine until I start to notice that words like GREY are being type GRAY, Harry's trainers are referred to as Sneakers and it's called JELL-O not JELLY! Maybe I'm blowing this out of proportion but a book by an English writer, in English should NOT be butchered merely to be sold in America! I am REALLY upset by this!

Like the title suggests I believe that the ENGLISH language is ENGLISH not American-English. How are our former colonial brothers so lazy with their pens? What is their obsession with 'z' (that's ZED not ZEE!) and why of why don't they like the letter 'u'?!

I don't have any point really, I just wanted to share with the world how disgusted I am with an English Publisher changing the original to make the nation of language butchers feel better about reading it! It's ENGLISH! We spell it correctly!

Rant, over.

Out of touch...

I have always had my comfort zones. Since I was a kid. Places I go to relax, to think, to enjoy, to feel safe. Previously there were people who I e-talked (like e-mail but it was a day long conversation) with EVERY day. Now, I am 5286 miles from home (Yes...I Google'd it) and I find myself thinking of those I don't get to e-talk to anymore.

It's a funny thing when you get what you've always wanted and it takes something from you at the same time. I feel a certain inner-struggle to come to terms with these facts. I miss what I knew (even though I wasn't 100% happy in what I was doing) and I LOVE the new-ness of everything here, the chances I have and the...THRILL of walking into somewhere full of people I don't know and striking up conversation. Still, there is missing parts of me. My safety net, my comfort zone. I refer here to people. The one's you've heard me talk about as my Family. I miss you guys and I know you know it. Sometimes I close my eyes, lie on my sofa and simply imagine being surrounded by you. Sometimes it's hard.

Today, as I sat at my desk I looked at my bookmarks on Chrome and saw the one named "Craig's BLOG". I read SO much new that is going on and I love your words fella. I then thought I'd have a look at mine and saw a message that was heartfelt and made me realise that; though my comfort is far away, it is still there.

Another instance of this is my daily e-talk (despite the distance) with Flossy. Who has made me realise this past week that just because it's far away doesn't mean it can't be relied on and that, being me, I will find people here to be the substitute (not replacement) for those people, places, and things back home that support and hold me up through bad times.

I am so far from your arms, but within your grasp.

Thank You.

Longings and Wishes...

The two are in some ways the same.

You can use both in the same context, you "long" for something as if it's missing from you and you can "wish" for something as if when the wish arrives it has always been there...therefore it was missing previously. We're on the same page now?? I hope so.

I WISH and LONG for a great many things. There is one thing that is unifying my thoughts and sometimes my dreams right now. I wont tell you the specifics because if you know me and you read this you'll know what I mean. Other than the obvious...here are some of the things I long/wish for:

My family to be here

The above

My own family (I wish for that which my friends have...sadly)

The above can be placed in one place. That is my biggest longing and my heartfelt wish. Even though I know it will NEVER be...

Aside from the above my life is absolutely MARVELOUS! I'm loving where I am, what I do...

Give me friends and family here and...it's all I can ask for. Give me the above (as if) and I'm complete here...guess I might be coming home at some point!

Thanks for putting up with this one...

Baseball, Beer, and Burn!

What a day yesterday was! 7.30am Mass to hear Armando give his reflection, then bumped into my boss and he told me I was going to the Baseball at Pac Bell (AT&T Park to most of the world...ALL of the world except Giants fans)!

Now, I'm not one to turn down a free day out and I've been interested in watching the sport to see whether or not I could like it. Turns out I can. I think it's helped by the tremendous facilities that are there. I'm not kidding there's restaurants, diners, burger bars, rice bars, ANYTHING you can think of. BUT, the downside: $9 for a beer!! Are you KIDDING me?! But I guess it's how it is.

Now, I was told that it would be cold as it's on the bay but it wasn't! I got BURNT! Badly! So, out comes the aloe and hopefully my skin wont divorce me!

I had thought that being here doing a job grounded in Spirituality I would be having much more deeper BLOGs than these. But, I think I'm having too much fun! Don't worry though...I'll return soon enough with a deep one...when I've finished being a tourist!

Photos, conferences, and haircuts!

The first 2 I have! Those of you who follow me on the generic social networking tool known as "FB" in some circles will have seen my pics on there and read my status about needing to erase something from my mind (and here enters the conference!).

As for the 3rd...I need to find me a barber! My usually short and neat hair is becoming a law unto it's self...it's curling at the ends for God's sake! So, tomorrow I venture out to find someone with scissors and a face that doesn't say: If you offend me I'm going to put these into your neck!

Today was a productive day for me. I now have a bank account (not that there's much in there but still..it's mine!), and I travelled on public transport here (The MUNI) for the first time. I saw the city hall which was HUGE! Why don't they do things small for a change?! There's nothing wrong with Nottingham City Hall (or County Hall for that matter) but in comparison they look like...cheap hotels! I can't believe how beautiful this city is and how much it has to offer to tourists! I say tourists because No one I know could ever afford to move here. The housing is astronomical! You're talking $1m plus for a 2 bed town house near my 'house'. CRAZY!

I'm going out soon to my favourite burger place and then to the Shannon Arms to have a couple of pints. You see, tomorrow is my day off in the week. Which to be honest is pretty laughable considering the work I do is busy for one day and EASY for the next 3... It will become more taxing but I've arrived here at the end of the academic year and, as the Church's role is tied in heavily with the school, we are slowing up and will prepare for the next year in August.

I love America. Everyone (due to their impossibly low rate of pay) is nice to you to get their tips, the food is good, the beer is cheap, and there is always someone in whatever place you find yourself with a smile...especially in Castro if you're a guy (you know what those big rainbow flags mean?? you get a LOT of those in Castro!).

So, This was pretty long considering it was meant to be an update! Those of you who I KNOW read this are being missed. SO much. But, I know with people like you in my life I'll be strong enough to see it out...and anything else life throws at me. For that I shall be eternally grateful and hope to one day return the favour.

In the words of my niece: Peace Out!

Oh, and my Mac is about to change all of the words to American English (one thing I hate) but I shall endeavour to change my dictionary to the correct one for my next...erm...edition!

Legal Alien...

That is my title! I am a "Legal Alien" in the United States of America...

Now, I miss my family (in both senses for those of you who understand what I mean) and I miss the familiarity of the places I came to be bored of...BUT I have so much to see here! So much to experience! To be honest...I have SO MANY reasons to come home. Out of the few people who read this there's a lot who I'd find reason to return for and the joy of it is...you know who are and why!

I have no idea where this is going. I just had hors doeuvres and cocktails followed by dinner with some GREAT men. But there IS something missing still. A HUGE void I hope some Americans can at least attempt to fill...

I ask for you thoughts, your love, your prayers. I love it here butI need strength...

New Things

This is going to be a list. I have been in San Francisco at my new Job as Youth Minister for the Parish of St Cecilia (who happens to be the patron Saint of MUSIC) in the Sunset District of Stan Franks Disco!!

What follows is what I have experienced since I have been here that I have found either refreshing, alien, or darn right STRANGE!

1 - My MacBook Pro

2 - My iPhone

3 - My brand new flatscreen LCD Samsung tv

4 - The appliances in my "home"

5 - America's "Grade School" system

6 - Driving on the right hand side of the road (in my bosses PLUSH Subaru - yes, he let me drive it...all on my lonesome!)

7 - The complete welcome I have had from EVERYONE I've met (randoms in a bar included)

8 - The fact that they have a place called BEVMO (Beverages More I think...a warehouse of alcohol)

9 - Young Catholic people who CARE about what they believe

10 - HARP Lager!!

11 - Golden Gate Park (Beautiful)

Basically, EVERYTHING over here is different and new to me. They don't refer to me as a "Legal Alien" for nothing. Frankly, I AM an alien. this is all new. It's wonderful. I love it.

I'm not getting too carried away. I'll tell you why. This is not really a conscious thing until I questioned it just now. But, I think I'm grounded by my love of my family and what will always be my true home. I miss you all and I miss that house. I can't wait for visitors and I'm looking forward to the summer when I get to see you all again. Those of you who read this can pass that message on for me. I like that there is a select few who read this. I like that I can say what I want...so, lets keep this our little secret update centre on my life.

I am blessed by this opportunity but more so by the support of my "Family".

2 to go...

It's a funny feeling when you realise your time is almost up...
I don't mean this in the drastic way you may read it as but...Tomorrow is my last day at the hell hole I've worked at for nearly 3 years and, on ocassion, has nearly beaten me into submission. I fear without this out-let and certain...special people, I may have been beaten long ago.
I wonder now about what I do next. I move to a new adventure on foreign shores which, while it excites me, scares the crap out of me! You see, my safety net is my family and those who I choose to call family. They are all SO close even if slightly distanced from me (geographically)...and now I leave them all behind in 9 days. Walking the tight-rope in San Francisco. Worrying about whether I'm cut out for all this after all!

I sit here at my desk. Thoroughly bored, and feeling the nerves build! After all this time is there a part of me afraid to leave what I know? Or is it the thought of leaving the people who I talk to everyday via e-mail and over cups of Yorkshire Tea?! It's the latter.

If you read this...you're in the privileged few people who know me and actually know about this. I'll miss you all. But...keep your eyes on this, your e-mails, your phones...and any other medium I can get my hands on...I may be going far away but I NEED to remain close.

If you judge people, you have no time to love them.
Mother Teresa.

Thoughts on life...

"Simplicity is the final achievment. After one has played a vast quantity of notes and more notes, it is simplicity that is the crowning reward of art." - Frederic Chopin.

I love my phone. The best thing about it is an app I have which gives me a daily quote. Every now and then (as you'll have seen in my previous entries herein) it gives me one that I like. One I'd like to adhere to or, in this case, one that makes me think about life in the World we all live in.

Simplicity is the crowning reward of art. Substitute the word art with life. We often clutter our lives with complications. Maybe, like me, you try to please everyone. This is no easy task. So, I will try from now to un-complicate my life. If I have made promise to one person they shall have it kept. If another situation arises it shall wait in line until the first promise has been fulfilled.

I will start with the following: I promise to always do what I can for those I call "Family". Their numbers dwindle of late due to my perceptions. But none the less, those in this elite group know who they are. They have my love and respect. Always. SIMPLE...

Visa...

Oh, and BY THE WAY...

I have a visa for the US! I'm leaving the shores of Blighty on the 8th April 2010. Stay tuned for un-interupted BLOGGING...I'm free of the cyber prison!

QUOTE OF THE DAY

"The Divine Light is always in man, presenting itself to the senses and to the comprehension, but man rejects it."
Giordano Bruno

This I fear is true in the first instance. In the second, not so. I know people who accept the Divine Light and allow it to guide them. One of whom I hold dear.

So, I encourage you to accept the Divine Light and see where it takes you. Even if your Divine Light differs from mine.

Cinematic Quotes

The things we see and hear often make us think. For example, my favourite film is called Pay it Forward. Watch it. It suggests a different way of living and quite frankly can touch the heart.

But, today I wish to share with yo a quote from a RomCom, a good toast to remember for gatherings of friends:

Never lie, steal, cheat, or drink. But if you must lie, lie in the arms of the one you love. If you must steal, steal away from bad company. If you must cheat, cheat death. And if you must drink, drink in the moments that take your breath away.

QUOTE OF THE DAY...

I have always observed that to succeed in the world one hsould appear like a fool but be wise!
Charles de Montesquieu

Faith

Conscious faith is freedom,
Emotional faith is slavery,
Mechanical faith is foolishness.

G. I. Gurdjieff

I wanted to share this with you because I like it.

Inspiration

I find myself with a distinct lack of the above. I have never really been arty, I'm not good at writing poetry or music...but I like to think that I live my life happily finding inspiration to guide me through the tough times...
So, as you can imagine, I have been wondering why I am so un-inspired. I think that seeking for inspiration has blinded me to being inspired. I have tried to find inspiration and like the elusive Scarlet Pinpernell she elluded me...
I have broken the chain.
Yeasterday I decided to smile at EVERYONE. I had a good response and found my day to be a happier one (either people thought I was incredibly polite or quite MAD)...I couldn't care less either way. I then read a BLOG...it inspired me. A friend talking about family. It was lovely.
There is no rhyme or reason to this entry really...
Maybe just to say, if you feel un-inspired stop looking for it. It will find you...

Aren't I GOOD?!

Well...it's about a quarter to 8 on the 6th Jan 2010. I've been at work for 20 minutes! God Damned snow! I thought the roads would be treacherous (which they are in places) but on the most part...dare I say it...the council have outdone themselves on the main roads.

So, I sit here. Waiting for the inevitable. There will be people who live closer to work than I that don't make it in today. There will be people who simple tell their bosses their roads are impassable and they can't come in. But, I work in facilities. We must be the ONLY dept that NEVER get any slack...on anything!

Do I have a mind to work my arse off today?! No. Do I have a mind to sack it off, sit here thinking about the journey home and wish I worked in a school given that they are all closed?! YES!

But, I think my little ramble today should have meaning. So here it goes. I'd like you all (I think 2 of you read this regularly - you know who you are) to spare a thought today for anyone who works in the emergency services, hospitals, and councils around you. It's very easy to criticise in our position. Too easy in fact. But try and bear in mind the fact that without such people we would be blind and stranded by weather such as this.

Remember the people around the world who have never be able to appreciate the joy of snow, focus on the joys. All of you who have children in your life will understand.

SO! Take care. Of yourselves and those you love. Whereas snow is beautiful and fun; like fire it can burn you forever.

Finally, my thoughts are with the family of one of my closest friends. I hope today goes well...or as well as they can at any rate.

How Long, How Much...

It's been FAR too long since I've done one of these! I don't even want to think about how much stuff I have thought and not documented...things I've done and things that have happened since my last entry...
So, it's 8am Tuesday 5th Jan 2010. My first day back at work and I say: SCREW the rules!

OK, well I think the largest item of news I have is this:
THE 1st PART OF MY VISA APPLICATION HAS BEEN APPROVED!! I am in no little way excited about this. The tunnel is not as long as I thought and the light is all the brighter! However, this presents me with some problems of a personal nature that I didn't imagine I would come across:
I think I'm in love with someone who I can never have completely...and now I'm leaving. Quite frankly I'm confused...melancholy has set in...excitement and sadness are not a good cocktail. I have no idea what I expected to happen. This was always on the cards and she is...taken (for the want of a better word).

So dear people, I have a suggestion about dreams. Dream away! Have as many as you wish! Have more than you could possible do...but try your best not to let the dream carry you away too far...another one might come and rip you away from it...and with that a piece of your heart...